What Has Happened to MTV!?

Twenty years ago, "Music Television" debuted to blaring rock music, a moonman planting a flag, and no sight of Carson Daly or Paris Hilton anywhere.

Sunday night, my worst fears were confirmed as I watched the MTV Movie Awards. MTV's audience has become an army of tween girls and tool guys.

This fact was confirmed by the following: awards were given to "Twilight," and "High School Musical 3" (lovingly referred to as an all-gay school by Andy Samberg). No awards to "The Dark Knight" or or any other remotely good movie. The best award was the fake award to the sound engineer (Mr. Carl Berman) who bleeped out all the cursing and vulgar words.

Still, this was a Movie Awards Show for the ages. It was the first legitimately good show since they made the decision a few years back to finally do it live again...and it appeased my complaints since they no longer leak who all the winners were before the show even aired.

The Movie Awards may not have been around as long as the far-superior Music Awards, but there is something refreshing about devoting a whole show to the cult movies and sillier movies of the year. Sure it's often poorly-written, hurried along, and filled with lame jokes, but it's a fun time. Most of the time it depends on who the host is. Andy Samberg gets my approval because he's fully comfortable with being a complete goof and actually is not afraid to say shocking things.

MTV Shows

Still, the Movie Awards are an interesting corner of pop culture. MTV has never been socially relevant...catering more to the fraternity/sorority crowd and the college demographic that we all love to hate. But MTV's relevance still says something about the times we live in: giving TV shows to women who won't ever have to struggle to find a job, or trumpeting the existence of the fraternity pretty boy who was born into affluence, is not that far off from the actual pitfalls of society. This fact became absolute truth when Miley Cyrus won Female Breakthrough, and had a complete country bumkin moment as she struggled to piece together coherent sentences.

Perhaps more importantly, the Movie Awards say something about consumerism and the pursuit of advertising dollars. It shouldn't surprise anyone that the two movies that made millions of dollars and are terrible win the golden popcorn. Is it MTV pandering to the viewers that will blindly buy fifty dollars of "Twilight" crap, and aspire to become the next Zach Efron, or is it a fundamental flaw in what people my age perceive as worthwhile entertainment? The Best Movie winner was determined by text voting, in the mold of American Idol, rather than merit. No wonder "Dark Knight" didn't win. Rather than doing the noble thing and giving Heath Ledger props for best male performer, they trot out Efron to thank his millions of screaming fans in the theater. Here is a kid that has more money than I will ever see, and is it alarming that MTV has switched over to the flashy and mass-appealing as opposed to the culturally shocking and anti-establishment refuge for teenagers and college students? Definitely.

The Movie Awards of old are certainly gone, but this year was a step in the right direction. Never have I seen such a stark contrast in two camps of culture than I did on this show. During one segment, thousands of girls are screaming for Robert Pattinson (by the way, does anyone else besides me remember that he was in Harry Potter #5 and played a character that dies?), and in the next segment, three credible actors sing "My Dick in a Box" and "Jizz in My Pants" behind an orchestra...followed by hottie Hayden Panettiere cursing like a sailor.

It was like watching a clash of two vastly different culture titans, and at the end they both decide to make out with each other. If that's not a signal of the times we live in, I don't know what is. This is not to say MTV is attempting to become socially progressive, but it was just hysterical that they mixed these two worlds that if ever mixed in mainstream society, the world would likely implode on itself.

The Movie Awards of old wouldn't have faked this, they would have let it happen, just like when Madonna and Britney Spears kissed that one time.

When Mike Myers, Ben Stiller, Jimmy Fallon, Sarah Silverman and Jack Black served as hosts for the Movie Awards, there were better movies out at that time, yes, but they embraced them, celebrated them. Now I fear a movie like "Austin Powers" wouldn't even make it onto a Movie Awards ballot because a majority of MTV viewers would say they hadn't seen it. In a few days I'll be seeing "The Hangover," and if MTV is listening, they'll put it in next year's show, because it's the kind of comedy that has been absent from theaters since "Anchorman."

The perfect summation for my feelings about the state of MTV and of our pop culture, is when Michael Bay marched onstage with Megan Fox in tow, a guy in the audience shouted, "I love you Micheal Bay!" Ten years ago Michael Bay was praised for "Pearl Harbor," and is now a god among the MTV masses. Myself notwithstanding. Either I missed something or I'm just not in the business of appreciating terrible movies (But yes, you will find a copy of "Pearl Harbor" in my basement that hasn't been touched since I first got it).

I'm happy MTV has gotten away from the days of "TRL" and "Spring Break," even though I willingly admit to watching both those things on occasional afternoons because it was cool at the time. But I am sure there is a whole demographic of people my age that want the old MTV back. But as long as they keep the Movie and Music Awards the same obscene and hysterical escape that they are, I'm willing to believe that MTV knows what it's doing.

Prediction for next year's show: "New Moon" beats out "Star Trek" by a 2 to 1 margin, as the average age of an MTV viewer is stable at a ripe sixteen.